


Drop Bears and Stuffed Wolves

by subtropicalStenella



Series: SWR: PTAU [10]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Double Dating, Ezra is Oblivious, F/F, M/M, Tattooine is Space Australia, Womp Rats, drop bears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-10
Updated: 2018-03-10
Packaged: 2019-03-29 13:33:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 432
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13928148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/subtropicalStenella/pseuds/subtropicalStenella
Summary: Ask from Rebels-PTAU blog (belated ao3 version) Do Ezra and Luke ever hang out?





	Drop Bears and Stuffed Wolves

  

(Ezra)  
AAAAGH.

Look. Luke is. Luke is fucking LUKE. He’s–

He’s Leia Freaking Organa’s long lost biological brother that she found on fucking accident while on some junior diplomat adventure camp bullshit internship I don’t even know okay. Like, how does that even happen “Oh hey I’m going to go to Australia for Cultural Exchange and somehow run smack into my FUCKING TWIN who I was separated from at birth due to Mysterious Political Shenanigans that involved the death of my biological mother and disappearance of my father TEEHEE”

It’s bullshit. And she’s all posh and rich and smart and shit and fucking LUKE looks, acts and talks like some stupid hayseed hick out of Buttfuck Nowhere, Kansas.

Except it’s not Kansas, it’s fucking Radioactive Desert Hell, Australia, home of the giant fucking murder spiders and baby eating dogs and All The Snakes and drop bears. What the fuck is a drop bear?!

We all went to State Fair as a group right? Sabine is on a date with Leia and I tagged along because Caleb and Hera were being Schmoopy at each other and Leia brings Luke along for some fucking reason and we were supposed to meet Jai and Zare but they saw who was with us so they fucking bailed on me and there’s one of those shooting booths, right? Air rifle and a bunch of targets you KNOW are rigged but they had this giant wolf stuffed animal that Cat would love to climb on okay so I had to try it. Obviously, the targets are rigged and the sights on the gun are off so I wasted like ten bucks and FUCKING LUKE is like “Can I try?” with his stupid fluffy hair flopping in his stupid big blue eyes so he kind of flips it out of the way and

PING PING PTING PING CLANG

Five bullseyes right in a row because apparently fucking showoff got a lot of practice in on his uncle’s farm chasing local predators away from the sheep and he tries to just hand me the stupid wolf like it was no big deal. “Oh look at me I’m Luke SKYWALKER, everyone likes me because I’ve got an accent and I’m just so fucking nice and act like the whole world is just sunshine and rainbows and I’m so handsome but I totally don’t know it and I really just want everyone to get along!” ASS. He’s just So Fucking Perfect and I can’t stand him.

  
(Sabine)  
Yeah no Ezra still hasn’t figured out it was a double date. He’s kinda dense.

 

 


End file.
